Wear Sunscreen...

It seems that music is a major influence in my life, apparently. The past few blogs of mine have been steamed from a song that evoked a feeling in me that prompted me to write - tonight, it's not a "song" that we're starting off with, it's the Baz Luhrmann "Wear Sunscreen" hit. Read:

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh,
nevermind, you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until
they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself
and recall in a way you can't grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous
you really looked. You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.
The real toubles in life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried
mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing everyday that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts.
Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you suceed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40. Maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either - your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can... don't be
afraid of it, or what other people think of it... it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance... even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines they will only make you feel UGLY.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they might be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

_________________________________________________________________

I've always loved this, but somehow, the:

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts.
Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

...is the part resonating with me right now. Reckless. This is one of my favorite words. Lets check on the definition:

"utterly unconcerned about the consequences of some action; without caution; careless"

Got it. This come down to a humanity thing with me again. Someone please answer this for me: How can someone be so reckless with another's heart and then exit their life like they were a dream? How can someone be so reckless with another's heart and still live their life as if nothing happened? How can someone be so reckless to someone that gave their heart to them and took care of their heart?

What the fuck, right?

I wish it was that easy there Baz to NOT put up with people who are reckless with my heart. Any normal person would be like, ok fine, you messed me up, so screw you.

Not me. I'm waiting for something, possibly to have it done back to me a million more times, even though I know very well that I deserve more than to be treated that badly. Why do we do this to ourselves?

Ah, shall I quote Mr. Larson? I shall...

Why do we stay with lovers who we know, down deep just aren't right?
Why would we rather put ourselves through hell than sleep alone at night?

I wish I knew the answer to this. My situation is not even a matter of thinking I was with someone that wasn't right for me, it was a matter of why am I still pouring my emotion into someone that dosent want to have anything to do with me anymore? That's the question. This is NOT me. This is what I mean, sometimes I regret love and other times it seems like the optomist Jeff comes out and he's all, no this happened for a reason'. Well, bitchy, negative Jeff is thinking how could he be so stupid to let someone come in, bring his walls down majorly and ultimatly be like, Ok, Fuck You, I'm done. Do people actually do this? Are people this mean and hurtful? Apparently. Be careful out there all you hopeless romantics. What seems real, might all be a show and insincere. Who knows.

Time really needs to hurry up and heal my heart because this is taking toll on my life.

No matter how bad I hurt, I still miss this person, everyday. It's awful.

Is it time for you, Scotland? Soon.

Soon.

I think there was a line in Sex and the City, something like it takes half of the time you were with the person to get over them? Hmm, alright - Two and a half months to go, and I'll be a healed heart? We'll see...find me at the end of October and see if I'm still hurting. Jesh, I hope not.

Goodnight. Counting down the serving shifts and it's showtime!

J